GROWING PAINS
When you were growing up, do you remember your legs hurting for about a week and then going to the doctor to find out you had grown three inches taller? Me neither. I remember getting some of the sickest scars from several attempts at dumb missions I gave myself. I had a lot to prove to myself as a kid. Well, I’m bringing this up because I think sometimes adults forget that growing pains are still a thing.
I am always hungry for the next best thing for myself. I am guilty of being the Aries woman that gets bored with her own goals and plans and spontaneously comes up with something else that seems more fun. Sometimes we are forced (by God, the universe, whoever) to pursue something that challenges us. If you’re like me, you’re attracted to challenges. They fuel your fire, your passion; but I have the discernment to know that sometimes, it comes with a consequence. I call it growing pains, relative to the physical feeling of growing up. When you go through something that makes you evolve, whether spiritually, mentally or financially, you may potentially experience a pain while on that journey.
Perspective: When I was in college, I was not interested in having a boyfriend at all, I just knew I had plans of having a boyfriend by the time I did graduate. I have had a couple serious relationships since 2016 and I’ll just say I’m manifesting a husband in the near future (and notice I said husband; moving on). I’ve had a couple flings, but nothing has been more exhausting in my adult life than dating. Being single irritates me more now because I’ve done so much growing as a woman, that I felt like a healthy, fun relationship should just come with this new stage in life, y’know? Can you relate?
When I was a teenager I got my feelings hurt because I dealt with teenage boys who didn’t know what they wanted and I didn’t understand why. We’re all grown now, so that just makes it easier to move on. Now that I think about it, that could still hurt; but as an adult I see a different perspective that allows me to be understanding in a way that helps me build boundaries, and new criteria for qualities I won’t accept. Get it? It’s feels more like a win to me, but to be honest I have to be in that mindset. Maybe THAT’s the difference. I swear, sometimes, the more I write, the clearer my thoughts become. That’s why I love doing this.
Here’s another, more recent example. My first job out of college was in retail. I was a key-holder for a boutique I grew to love enough to assist managing. My original plan was to only do it for a year and move on to what I really wanted to do (once I figured that out 100%). Before I knew it, contentment and comfort became complacency and stagnancy. I didn’t hate the job, I hated that it felt like that was it for me, and I still wanted more for myself. It was time to move. I went on a friend-cation in April 2018 and told my boss-friend that I would be looking for a new job when I returned. Fast forward to July, I had officially been jobless for a month, but I finally got an offer to do a job somewhere I had been wanting to live. It was the hardest time of my life. I was at the job I wanted, but my friendships were low key falling apart, my mental health was suffering and I was undervalued at the job I wanted so badly. In September I was unexpectedly laid off, literally days after being approved for my first big girl place of residence, which also didn’t end well. I learned so much about myself and adulting in a matter of months. I’m not sure how quickly other people learn/-ed the lessons I did, but whew! At twenty-two it felt like A LOT.
So I wanted to think of a couple different ways to deal with these “growing pains”. Maybe I’ll do a YouTube video on it. And speaking of, subscribe to your girl’s channel ASAP and comment below what kind of content you like to see.
Xoxo, richelle
p.s. - week three of the quarantine. I started Somebody’s Quaranting on Instagram because I was bored one day. I’m waiting on it to blow up one day. LOL - I’ll update later.
